It’s been a long time since this blog broke out from the never completely working confines of MySpace and dared to venture out into it’s own situation. That’s right, it’s sorta kinda the one year anniversary for this little (but big where it counts) website!

Instead of doing what some of the most popular blogs do and have neat contests and flashback dealies I’m going to do something different. It’s time for you people to send me cars, cash money, houses, girlfriends, prizes, quesadillas and Faberge eggs. This all has to be slid across a trampoline to me by a team of hot and naughty (female) models. It’s really the only way to receive a gift, if you think about it.

I also wanted to take this time to discuss where this blog is headed and what you can expect out of me in this next blogscal year. So you remember this last year when I wrote funny blogs every once in a while, and then begged people to read them, for no real reason? Yeah, it’s probably going to be exactly the same as that. To be honest I never really knew what to expect from creating a blog, and still don’t. I’m totally wingin it over here and I haven’t really accomplished a whole lot except maybe spreading a few jollies and offending a few douche-cocks.

I don’t know exactly how much I’ll be posting in the near future. I’m actually thinking about writing some stuff that has the possibility of making me some actual money or something, though I don’t really know how that works. I’m also going to try and find a way out of my job and Iowa situations. Not to mention all the time I’m going to be spending with all my new prizes and goodies you send me.

However, I do plan on doing something completely unnecessary at some point. I’m going to attempt to write one original blog a day for an entire week. Or I’m going to put up a new blog every day for a month, even if it’s just a funny video or picture I find on my internet travels. I don’t know when this is going to take place, or why I would do this to myself, or yourself for that matter, but it’s going to be done.

So in recap: keep checking back, send me prizes, tell people about the site, and for the love of fucks sake leave me comments or send me emails on the Contact page about what you’d like to see happening on this site, or if you want me to write something for your project, or if you’re just really, really lonely. I know I seem a little unapproachable and you may be intimidated by my manliness, but I’m really quite an approachable gentleman… Just don’t be a fucking idiot about it or I will bop you in the head with a toaster oven.

Tags: one year anniversary

Welp, it’s been almost two weeks since I’ve posted anything here on my blog so I figured I’d put up little update of sorts. I’ve been kind of busy with things and stuff and trying to figure out what I’m going to do with my life situation (the lack of money part, I’m not gay or anything). Kind of taking it a little chill on the blog lately, half break sort of. Actually, I have a plan for this blog which I’m hoping will bring more good situations from it. I’m going to treat this blog like a woman. I’m going to ignore it completely and act like I don’t need it, then hopefully it will try to win me back with blowjobs (aka more readers and/or money). Then me and blogging will live happily ever after… Until she starts getting hollowed out by black dudes on the side.

Since there has been a lack of entertainment on the blog lately I thought I’d post a video that I just came across that I found slightly comical. It’s titled “The Worst Porn Intro Ever”.

So as you notice things look a little different around here. I changed the entire design of the site! Oh Happy Day! If you missed it I put a poll up asking which design was better, the old one or the new “test” one. Well only one person said the old one was better and as far as I’m concerned that person can go fuck themselves.

Things are still being tweaked and figured out so if you run across any problems Contact Me. Or don’t and just laugh at me behind my back whilst it goes unfixed for months.

Meanwhile I am on notice for jury duty for the entire month of November. If I do get chosen to be on the jury I hope it’s a rape case, and the victim is there. I’m always on the look out for easy women…